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Tears and Mayonnaise
You came for the tears, you stayed for the mayonnaise
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Words and the Song of the Summer
First of all, this is
the song of the summer
:
Holger Czukay - Cool In The Pool
- Watch more
Videos
at Vodpod.
Do with that
information
what you will. Hopefully whatever you do, it will be
hot
,
naughty
and/or
erotic
.
And then you will write to me about it.
Ohhhhhhhh
yeahhhhhhhh
.....
Second of all, I am as
surprised
as
you are
,
hypothetical reader
, that I'm making a new post. But someone (probably me)
begged
me to make a new post so I am. And the
focus
is on words.
Word fact #1: This is a word
Word fact #2: This is not a word
BUT
IT IS
.
Mind blown
? I know
mine
is. I also know that MINE IS A WORD ALSO!!!!!!!!
Sorry
.
Word fact #3:
Saudade
is a word in
Portugeese
is
UNTRANSLATABLE
except for if you translate it
INTO MUSIC.
Which is what the
Portugays
did.
After they stopped mattering as a people.
Word fact #3a: Different languages have different words for the same thing.
This is because Daniel cut Samson's hair after Jezebel ate Moses' apple in space.
Also,
dinosaurs were eating melons at this time,
I don't know if I mentioned that...
Word fact #3b: Different languages have different words for different things. This is because DOYE.
Word fact #4: Some
nerds
think that we have a
natural capacity for language
. They call this Universal Studios Grammar. It 's where parents take their kids instead of Disneyland Grammar as punishment.
Word fact #5:
God speaks Arabic
. This is pretty obvious.
Word fact #6:
A pun is a play on words
, which not as fun as
a play on wheels
.Nor is it as illegal as playing with a child
DOWN THERE
, which reminds me of a joke I heard:
A man walks into a bar
and says, "
I am a pedophile.
"
He is promptly arrested and thrown into prison.
It turned out, however, that he wasn't the one who was a pedophile; in fact no one in the bar was.
It was a (democrat) duck who had foolishly walked into the bar earlier that evening and had returned, seeking vengeance for his earlier injury.
The
duck used his skill at ventriloquism
so that
the poor, innocent, white American male
would be slandered by
the socialist press.
After
a beneficent judge
(NOT AN
ACTIVIST ONE
WHO WOULD HAVE LOVED IT IF THE DUCK HAD
MARRIED
A CHILD IN FACT) threw out his conviction,
the man granted one interview to the media who had besmirched his good name
. Through his tears he admits, "The American justice system is the best in the world. My time in prison was even better than my time in community college." And then he
farted
.
Word fact #7: Lists of facts are composed of words. They are also boring.
FIN
.
PS: So this post isn't completely useless, here is a
download link
to a mix I made. Below is the playlist:
Neil Young "Walk On"
Alhaji K. Frimpong "Kyenkyen Bi Adi Mawu"
Scotty "Believe in Love"
Touty & Absa Cora Group "Palestine"
Omar Souleyman "La Sidounak Sayyada"
Althea & Dorothy "If You Don't Love Jah"
Lifetones "Good Side"
Cabaret Voltaire "Silent Command"
Pylon "Cool"
Throbbing Gristle "Hot on the Heels of Love"
The Birthday Party "The Friend Catcher"
Dum Dum Girls "Catholicked"
Nerve City "Living Wage"
Savage Republic "Film Noir"
Snatch "All I Want"
The Incredible String Band "Blues for the Muse"
Current 93 "Oh Coal Black Smith"
Zola Jesus "Last Day"
Tappa Zukie "Tappa Zukie in Dub"
Tolerance "Voyage au bout de la nuit"
I suggest you think about it as having a Side A and a Side B (divided as shown above). That way it makes it seem like I intentionally broke the flow midway through...
PSS- I hate talking babies.
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Dr. S.F. K----
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